He Faked It!

I’ve been out of the loop for the past twelve hours, reading a book. Look what I missed by not turning on the radio, TV or Facebook! Breaking news!

The news of the day is that the LAUSD cop who got shot at last week faked it! He faked it! Turns out there isn’t a crazed, forty-something, white man with a pony tail and gun, hiding in somebody’s garage in the west valley after all!

Lots of people have rotten eggs on their faces this morning. This story has had a bad smell to it, ever since it broke. My first thoughts when I heard it were: Why all this media and police attention? It’s a horrible thing when a cop gets shot at, but it happens all the time in L.A., and the news doesn’t always cover it. Why now? Was it because it took place in an affluent area of the west San Fernando Valley? Why did they close streets and schools all day? Why so many cops (reports are 300-400) to search for a bad guy on foot? Why did the cops declare the senior citizen who called 911 a hero? A hero? For doing what every decent citizen is expected to do if they witness a crime? A HERO? Since there was no bad guy, why did this old man call 911? Or did he? And then there were the public speeches made by prominent elected officials and the newly appointed people of power. Lots of free TV ad time…… I’ll bet they wish that could give that TV time back now.

What happens to the faker now? I was really happy to hear Superintendent Cortines come out strong this morning, saying “You’re fired!” But will he fire him? Can he? Or will this be another disgusting defeat for human decency if his union steps in and rescues him?

If his union doesn’t end up fixing things for him, and I really hope it doesn’t, perhaps he’ll hire a lawyer to get him off. He could use the Twinkie combined with hot coffee and Prozac defense, where he ends up the victim of chemicals and heat. That might work, but only if he gets an attorney east of Reseda Blvd. The attorneys west of Reseda Blvd were pretty freaked out when their streets were closed, cop cars and news trucks were everywhere, and their kids had to pee in trash cans on that fateful day when the LAUSD cop faked it.